Fall: you're doing it wrong, Hamburg.

They do fall wrong here. Usually I hate the "you're doing it wrong" click-bait headlines, but in this case it really feels apt.

First, fall started August 8th. The temperature dropped, the air was dry with a cool wind, and it smelled like Autumn. Someone across the street was even baking with a whole lot of cinnamon.

Second, there is a significant lack of fall flavours. Oh, there are some cooking pumpkins in the store, but they're Hokkaido Pumpkins (you can still make puree out of them) and no Libby's cans of pumpkin, no pumpkin beer, pumpkin pies and besides the Starbucks in the train station, no pumpkin coffee. No caramel apples, no scarecrows, no hay rides, no bumpy squashes my mom calls 'interesting' but I think look kind of gross. No apple cider, (the non alcoholic, unfiltered, spiced and hot kind), no apple picking.

The leaves do have the decency to turn color, though.

But even that doesn't make up for the dismal appearance Halloween makes. Some kids do go trick-or-treating (Suß oder Sauer /sweet or sour here, which I have to admit is a great translation), but it's not in the collective German Psyche, like it us in the US. A few decorations in shop windows to get children interested, and that's about it.

No parades, no themed parties, no sexy insert-profession-here costumes to giggle at, and absolutely no wearing costumes to work or school.

Then there's no Thanksgiving or similar holiday. The Christmas Markets start in late November, but there's no kind of seasonal celebration for Fall.

 

There is the National Day of Unity, October 6th, when a whole lot of nothings happens. We're supposed get the day off (it's a national holiday, but a workshop was scheduled that day anyway at work), but that's it. I've asked Germans what they do to celebrate, and they blink at me and say "drink".